Everyone loves to wear clothes that live with you, breath with you and are comfortable. Practitioners of New Age lifestyles are no different. We want durability, comfort and economy in these economically unsound times. Therefore, we are proud to present the very latest in New Age wear – The Cosmos Collection.

Please note that our first model, Akasha, is wearing a jumpsuit from our line, “Chakra Chic.” Done in elegant and blended rainbow tones, each represents a specific chakra. Form fitting for the most rigorous balancing sessions, this material will not inhibit energy transference. Notice that all chakra points have transparent insets made from 100% natural energy. Of course, for modesty’s sake, we do offer an opaque version. Thank you Akasha.

And here comes Hunter in our newest look for pagans, our Rags To Rituals line. You see that Hunter looks marvelous in this silk and brocade robe, complete with hood and wide lapel. Deep pockets allow Hunter to carry his ritual items with him, while concealing his ritual jewels. And Voila! as Hunter demonstrates the tear-away feature of this garment for those Skyclad events. Oh my, Hunter. And um…thank you.

Here we have Gaia, demonstrating the comfort of our new Landmass Line for that motherly figure. See how the moss green natural fabric moves as Gaia moves. (Gaia, please stop turning dear.) The sky blue outer shift protects against all kinds of weather without the appearance of bulkiness. For the rounded among us, this garment only requires a little TLC to maintain its perfection. Thank you Gaia. (Stop spinning!)

Ah, please welcome Pearl, wearing the ultimate in our new “Yes It’s Yoga” knit collection. Notice how the material moves with our model. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, these garments will stand up under the most rigorous workout. Watch as Pearl demonstrates the “twistability” of this body suit as she easily slips into the most difficult of yoga positions. We see that the fabric and stitching hold up as Pearl maintains her pose. Thank you Pearl….Thank you Pearl….Pearl?…Could someone come get her please?

And finally, the Jewel in our Crown Collection this year….Wisdom Wear, for the Guru in all of us. Easy, comfortable and flowing, like the ebb and tide of life’s oceans. Roomy in the seat, with extra padding for those long stints on the mountain top. Yet washable with ease for the kitchen table set. Soft and odor-resistant, this garment is designed to be worn on even the longest journey with the ease of a single step.

Thank you for joining us this evening Ladies and Gentlemen. Our collection for the New Age has been brought to you through the auspices of the New Technicats Coven, the Association for a Natural New Age and the League of Aquarian Lycra Lovers. We wish you a pleasant good night.